They Were Human, Too

A recent post from a Facebook friend: 

“I have never been so pissed off. I was getting a tea at Camanche Blues, and the lady in front of me said to the man behind the counter, “You have a great Labor Day.” I said, ‘You mean Memorial Day.’ She replied, ‘Whatever, it's just another day off work for me to be able to drink.’

   It took all the self control I have not to reach out and slap [her]. I'm deeply saddened that some think of this weekend to just party. I would be okay with celebrating the life of a Soldier, Marine, Airman or Sailor and their Ultimate sacrifice for our freedom, but anything less is just heartless and anti-American.”

As many know, our home was burglarized a few weeks ago. The thieves took many, many things of both monetary and sentimental value. The thought that someone could just invade our home - with family photos surrounding them, and an apparent life built around love, laughter and family - had greatly shocked us. Then it made us angry, then we went into denial; then it made us grieve.

But then, it made me understand.

This is going to be a very different “Memorial Day” for me. A history of war and violence has divided our nations for the not-so-simple reasons of power and control. The world has become a global realm of systems – monetary, military, political, social, media, religious, ethnic, etc. I think about the lives lost along the way for the sake of these powerful systems, and wonder if humanity will ever learn their history lessons (that is, if they are not re-written). How empires fell. How tribes have become extinct. How life has evolved and has changed over time. How power, money and control tries so hard to compete against love, peace and the “pursuit of happiness”, when illusions of grandeur greatly mislead.

I remember when my son graduated from USMC Boot Camp at Pendleton. Tears were streaming down my face, my hands on the camera shaking as I saw him standing at attention after the Motivational Run. I remember the day he left and came home (thank God) from Iraq. I remember when my daughter graduated from USMC Boot Camp at Camp Lejeune, stood at attention with hairline fractures in her ankles because she had helped carry a fellow Marine's pack and rifle, in addition to her own (an extra 100 lbs), during The Crucible. I remember hearing stories from a US Navy SEAL friend of mine who has served all around the world, including Afghanistan, Iraq, and several third world countries, wondering how he could file away, in his mind, the horrors he's had to witness. I think about my grandfather, Stephen H. Starks, WWI, who wrote back home to the love of his life, that bullets were flying by him, his comrades were falling, but “it must be the sweater you knitted me that has protected me.”  I think about my birth father in Vietnam, think about my grandfather, WWII. I think about the tradition of my father and I, raising and lowering the US flag at the church at sun-up and sundown. I'll be thinking about all fallen heroes on the day of Monday, May 27, 2013.

When I see people cheapening Memorial Day down to a mere holiday where they can drink and party, I, too am sickened. This nation is built upon the back and strength of warriors that have given their lives and livelihoods for our sakes. At the very least, a moment of silence is in order. Respect and honor. Could you at least muster that up?

Next weekend, May 31-June 2 is a music benefit for our Veterans (see info below). Ironically, the event is shared with Wesley Black Elk, who will be the guest speaker on “The Lakota Way of Life”. May we never forget that the United States of America was founded upon terrorism, bloodshed and violence. The genocide of America’s indigenous tribes was horrendous. However, how many American Indian veterans have fought for America’s freedom? How many African-American slaves, freed or not, fought as well? How many other [immigrant] families have watched and bear the burden of loss as their children, grand-children, and great-grandchildren were wounded or died on the fields of battle?

Perhaps it is time that we lay our weapons down, shed the systems, attitudes and behaviors that seem to control our minds, hearts and souls, and realize that it is love, forgiveness and mercy that could prevail, if only given the chance. The thing that prevents us is trust, because it has been violated so many times. I’m not saying that we all have to agree on everything (Lord knows, I’m not the most agreeable person). What I am saying is that, when tragedy strikes us close to home, what do we do? Go into shock, anger, denial and revenge? What path do we decide to take? The one that feeds us? (“Two Wolves”, http://www.firstpeople.us/FP-Html-Legends/TwoWolves-Cherokee.html”). Or the one that makes us not bitter, but better?

I admit that I’ve had a hard time regaining trust in humanity after our home was invaded. I’ve had a difficult time with the systems in place that do nothing to help us. However, what I do know is that the powerful system of family and friends has proven the most important of all. So let us not forget – let us all remember - those in our past who have sacrificed so much, so that we might live another day, another week, another month, another year in the “land of the free and the home of the brave.”

They were soldiers…and they were human, too.